*MARADHI*

By Bundi Dennis Kiambi

Yalikuwa yamenitesa hadi ya kuteseka. Nikawa mnyonge, nikachekwa, sikula, sikulala, yakanichoma moyo na kuunguza. Nikajionea haya, nikakosa raha.

Maisha yakawa hayana maana, nikawaza hadi ya kuwaza, nikawa nimefika mwisho wa fikra. Nikalia machozi yakesha, kutwa nikakosa utulivu, kucha nikawa sina usingizi.

Nikaijutia nafsi yangu, nikajichukia kisha nikalaani, nikajilaani mwenyewe kwa kuwa zumbukuku, nikalaani uwepo wangu katika dunia, nikalilaani jina langu, nikawa nimetamani kifo.
Mapenzi yangu ya mauti yakayapiku yale ya uhai.
Nikalaani mamangu mzazi, nikamlaani kwa kunileta duniani, nikamlaani kwa kunilea na kunitunza siku zote hizo kisha nikaiishia hali hii.
Nikauchukia ulimwengu na viumbe vyake vyote, vina faida gani kwangu? Nikaichukia alfajiri, nikayachukia machweo. Nikatamani sana dunia ipasuke iumeze uhai wote wa ulimwengu, inichukue Mimi na viumbe vyote vilivyomo.
Nilichukia siku za mbeleni, nikakata tumaini.
Siku zilivyozidi kusonga, ndivyo kidonda kilivyozidi kunitia taabu, kikakua na kuwa kikubwa. Kikasambaa na kutambaa mwilini kote, nikakonda nywele zikawa nyekundu,midomo ikawa kuni.
Nguo zikanivaa, maozi yakanitoka Pima. Kucha zikaning’oka. Kisha ngozi yangu ikawa inajivua kutoka mwilini.

Siku zikajizorota , zikasonga.
Haidhuru, yaliwadia.

Siku ikafika, utulivu ukanijia, mchanganyiko wa furaha na majonzi, nikaona kupumzika kwaja, nilikuwa nimeitamani sana siku hii. Ilikuwa imewadia, nikavaa tabasamu, ubaridi ukanijia mwilini, nikayafumba macho, Giza……..

© Dennis K Bundi.
bundidennis.wordpress.com

Published by Bundikiambi

"GO PLACIDLY amid the noise and the haste, and remember what peace there may be in silence. As far as possible, without surrender, be on good terms with all persons." Desiderata

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